Thursday, July 28, 2011

Hunk Oh Hunk Of Burning Stress

"They" say moving is one of the most stressful things a person can do in life; it keeps company on the list with getting married, divorced, starting a new job, being laid off or fired from your job, buying and selling a house, having a child/being a parent and having someone you are close to die. I've had experiences now with all but one of these and some more than others.

Probably the all time humdinger was in June of 2000 when FIVE occurred at once: I got divorced, we sold our house (while we were basically estranged), I moved from Colorado back to California (I had to leave my cats in Colorado for about three weeks; thankfully, I had a wonderful friend who went over to the house and checked on them every day), I started a new job where I had a lot to prove (or at least I thought so then) and I bought a house (and had to live almost three months in a Residence Inn until that process was complete; juggling what to do with Nigel and Clyde when I had to go out of town on business trips (please, maids, DON'T go into the room and let them out!))

When all was said and done, the entire change was crammed into roughly three months. Oh, and in the middle of all of this, my dad had a heart attack and my youngest brother also went through a nasty break-up and divorce (as an aside, our divorces were final within one week of each other; mine 7/24 and his 7/31, something I'll never forget).

Frankly, I'm surprised I didn't go totally bonkers because I was doing much of this by myself (although I did have incredible support from family and friends and certainly managed to have some fun along the way (thanks, Nathaniel)).

Anyway, it's eleven years later and the circumstances behind the move, although not 100% happy-happy joy-joy, are positive.

Still. Still. Moving IS stressful. And time consuming. And complicated. There are so many balls in the air at once and you really cannot drop any of them. Not only that, I feel as though I have to watch everyone else involved to ensure they don't drop any balls, either. I have a huge Excel workbook with multiple sheets in it, each one with a ca-zillion "to dos". Mr. B and I have assigned who is doing what and so far that is mostly working, with the only real problem being every time I strike one off, I seem to add five more. Mr. B tells me every day, "We're getting stuff done!", and, he's right, we are. In fact, frankly, I think we may be overly efficient as at times we're sitting around waiting for other people to do what they are supposed to and it seems mighty slow. I have to work hard on curbing my ex HRD persona and riding herd on those who don't return phone calls or emails as quickly as I feel they should OR who don't behave the way I believe they should. Mr. B sighs and probably wishes he could keep me half-snookered all of the time so that I'd chill out.

In my defense, it's extremely difficult to chill out when it's 100 plus degrees with high humidity such that it feels as though it's 115. And, this is likely one reason why things don't move along as quickly as I'd wish; it's hard to move quickly, period.

So, some of those most stressful/sad (for me) things about moving et al this go-around (including the fore mentioned aspect of people not having the same sense of urgency that I do) are:

Identifying and selling roughly 1/3 of our furniture. Or, hoping to sell it; whatever doesn't sell gets donated and written off. Although we opted for a smaller house, it's still somewhat sad to have to part with some of the things we've both had for many, many years.

Preparing for a moving sale. Wow, what a hassle! At times, I've found myself wondering if this is really going to be worth the effort.

Getting the current house ready to go onto the market/selling it. I've bitched enough about this so I won't go any further.

Having to leave the current house empty while we bop off to FL. I know I can't wait to get to FL, but, I feel "bad" for this house sitting here all by itself.

Worrying about the pets, well, really the cats, as we travel to FL. They've never had to deal with being in the car longer than 1/2 hour, let alone staying in a hotel room for several days.

Fretting about ALL the pets and how they'll adjust to their new home.

Money. Moving is not cheap. Everything requires money! You know it going in, but, after several weeks of writing checks for this or that, it wears on the soul.

Ok, enough negative crap. Across the miles, I can hear my Father saying to me as he reads this, "No crisis before its time, Christina!" And, my former Executive Coach just commented on one of my pissy Facebook status updates and reminded me that I am the Captain of My Soul and not to let things ruin my day.

I think I just needed to rant a bit, and, frankly, remembering that move back in 2000 really did help me appreciate how much improved the move circumstances are now compared to then.

Mrs. B


Doc said...

I hear you on the to-do lists. Just remember you're alive and eventually you'll be doing exactly what you want to do, so relax, don't do it or do do it. Whatever Frankie. Did you name your cat Frankie after Frankie Goes to Hollywood?

Analee said...

"Mr. B sighs and probably wishes he could keep me half-snookered all of the time so that I'd chill out." that made me laugh. i bet nathaniel thinks the same thing about me. he can't even read a book without me giving him the evil eye for not being productive.

thanks for making me smile, and for not making me feel like i'm the only one. :)