Friday, June 24, 2011

The Forgotten Thought Place


Is there a place where forgotten thoughts go? These thoughts sit around in a waiting room, or, a holding tank; maybe something like a prison cell, waiting for the moment when, whomever it was that at one time thought them, remembers them once again? Does some sort of warden or jailer come into the cell and gruffly shout out, “You! “Forgotten Thought Number 7,821; otherwise known as “Hmmm…should I take an Italian class this year?” Get over, here, you’ve been re-thought!”

Can these forgotten thoughts only be re-thought by their original thinker, or, can they be re-allocated to another person that might have had that very same thought at some other point in time? Are there several of the same forgotten thoughts hanging out together in this cell? “That corner over there, that’s where the “Don’t forget to buy cat litter” thoughts assemble, and over there, those are the “What was I going to do when I got upstairs?” thoughts.”?

Or, is there only one of these thoughts in existence, such that, if that thought is occupied, it cannot be thought of at that same time by anyone else in the universe?

Are there possibly many similar thoughts, with, perhaps, slight variations in how and when they were thought? One might be a long, drawn out thought and another might be fleeting? One might arrive in the middle of the night, while another one materializes when one is shaving one’s legs?

Could the same concept go for long-forgotten objects? Is there a special holding tank for mis-placed people, places and things? Former co-workers? Ex-lovers? Your grandparent’s old farmhouse that you used to visit frequently but have long since let slip out of your mind? Pets you used to have? Books you read but don’t recall? Cars that your parents used to drive? Things that you put down and then never found again, e.g., earrings, half-written letters, the odd tube of lipstick, the little latch keys that are hung over the doorways to bathrooms so that little children cannot get locked inside them?

What about emotions? Haven’t you heard someone exclaim “That sunset was so awesome, I forgot to be sad!” or, “The situation was so absurdly funny, I forgot that I was angry!”?

Are “Sad” and “Angry” hanging out in a cell somewhere too? Sad is sitting over in the corner steadily weeping while Angry bangs on the iron bars demanding to be let out?

This cell (or cells) could be quite the interesting place to visit, or, it could be quite alarming.

Could you imagine walking into this cell and being simultaneously bombarded by all of your forgotten thoughts and misplaced nouns (people, places and things)? Come to think of it, this could be a new sort of capital punishment; death by all of the thoughts and nouns in your life that you carelessly forgot or misplaced.

Or, maybe that punishment would be more fitting if the condemned was attacked only by their forgotten thoughts and misplaced nouns that were mean, hurtful, shameful, scary, evil and sad?

Can you imagine what the enactment of your death sentence might be?

And, for those people that are, for the most part, honorable and decent and loving and caring, well, perhaps their reward is just the opposite. At their end, they will walk into a room full of their loving, generous, happy, sweet, warm and caring forgotten thoughts and misplaced nouns.

Maybe I’ve simply just described one concept of heaven and hell.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Mrs. B's High School Graduation. 30 Years Ago Today!



I suppose a lady isn't meant to admit how old she is, but, in this day and age, with 50 being the new 40 and 40 being the new 30 et al, that puts me under 40. Not to mention, I'm just happy to be alive. As should we all.

Anyway. 30 years ago. June 18, 1981. I'll never forget the day because of the obvious, 18 is the reverse of 81 (you know what I mean). Also, it is Sir. Paul McCartney's birthday; not that I really cared but Peri, my best friend in high school did. Now, the date is shared with my step-daughter's birthday, AKA The Kid (she is nineteen years old today, BTW) so I REALLY won't ever forget.

San Diego, California June 18, 1981. My Father was in town for the ceremony, he stayed next door with our neighbors. They were unusual folks, worthy of a blog topic unto themselves. Anyway, their living room is where these pictures were taken. My younger sister Kathy, also one of my best friends, was posing with us.

Somewhere I have pictures of the ceremony, post ceremony, and the party my parents had for me later that evening. What fun. My boyfriend Greg was there; as was his family and many of my family's friends. I remember that, after the party, Greg and I headed out to do whatever; we drove around and around the Mission Beach area until we finally decided to stop and have a late night snack at Denny's. I'm sure we were doing other things as well, but, this is a G-Rated post so I won't go into that.

Not too many days after, the whole fam-damily headed East to Indiana for our annual road trip to visit grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. That particular summer, I was dropped off in Columbus, OH, where my step-mom picked me up and drove me on to Cleveland where I spent several weeks with her and my Father (who, BTW, had flown on to somewhere else after the graduation festivities; work-related, no doubt). Although I had a good time with them (as I always did), I was moping around quite a bit because I missed Greg. When I got back to San Diego, my dad started in on me about getting a summer job because he certainly didn't want me goofing off for the remaining month or so before I started college at San Diego State University. I ended up at a fast-food joint called Carl's Jr. I absolutely HATED working there and thankfully I only did so for about nine months.

I've been reading some of the articles in the local paper here in Durham about various recent high school graduates. These stories highlight both their accomplishments while in high school and their plans for the future. Some have been quite impressive, but, I must admit, they've left me feeling a bit odd. It seems the kids today are a lot older than I was when I graduated; more responsible with a heck of a lot more ambition and drive. I didn't really pick up those two traits until my mid twenties. Maybe I was just a late bloomer? But, nah, I think back on the majority of my friends and peers (at least those that I was hanging around with in the early 80s) and I don't seem to recall any of us having a lot of purpose. Here are the things I cared about that summer of '81:

1. Greg
2. Friends
3. Having fun
4. Not getting caught doing things I wasn't supposed to be doing
5. Going to the mall(s)
6. My shift at work being OVER
7. Going to the beach/getting a good tan
8. Drinking ice tea and smoking while blabbing away with Peri, Kathy and Lynda at Carl's Jr.
(interestingly enough, even though I hated working there, I loved hanging out there)
9. Avoiding responsibility
10. Avoiding thinking about anything that led me down the path to responsibility

So, yeah, thinking about college, what I was going to study, what I was going to do with the rest of my life, nope. Didn't make the list. DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT! Those of you who know me now but didn't when I was a teenager can go verify this with those who did know me. Despite how well I did in high school grade-wise, I was a total flaky party girl from the moment I graduated high school until July of 1987 when I began my career in Human Resources at TRW. Just ask:

1. My parents
2. My sister Kathy
3. My best friend Peri and her sister Lynda
4. My best friends from college Kathleen and Don
5. Boyfriends I had during those years (then again, nah, don't ask them!)

So, back to the kids today. Or, even MY step-kid. They seem so darn mature. Whenever I spoke to or saw The Kid during this past year (her first at college), she usually seemed stressed out about her studies and always busy doing something that I'd probably classify as "Not Fun". I'd tell her, "Be sure to have some fun!" "I don't have time for fun!" she'd reply. "No time for fun? Perish the thought!", I thought. Heck, she's going to have plenty of time in her life to be serious and work hard. I certainly know this now and am thankful I can at least look back on my younger days and remember how much fun I had. In fact, I actually believe it prepared me to work hard later on. I was so darn rested up from having all that fun, I was ready to go full bore out for about 20 years (before I decided it was time to stop all that working crap and go have more fun!)

Anyway, maybe responsibility comes with certain eras. I'm fairly sure that my grandparents didn't have time for all the fun business, and I don't think my parents did, either. I guess those of us in the 70s and 80s were pretty lucky but times, they changed after that, it seems. My youngest brother didn't appear to have a whole heck of a lot of fun after he graduated from high school (compared to my other brother whom I think did, at least judging from all the times he asked me to buy him beer). Now, The Kid, almost twenty years later; nope, no fun.

Or, maybe she's just REALLY REALLY good at not getting caught :-)

Mrs. B


Thursday, June 9, 2011

Questions Questions Questions


I'm Blog stymied again so here are a round of random questions I found on-line just to get me writing!

Do you like to shop?
Yes. Quite a bit, actually; but not necessarily because I want or need a lot of things, I just have fun at it. I especially enjoy going to the grocery store. Always have.

How often do you go on-line?
Several times per day. In fact, I'm never really off-line when I'm at home. My laptop is almost always on.

What do you miss from your childhood?
Simplicity.

Who do you miss from your childhood?
Everyone and every pet that's now lost to me.

Are you usually late, early or right on time?
Early. Always early.

Are you happy with your life right now?
Mostly. There are lots of exciting changes a foot which can also be a tad overwhelming at times, but, in general, I'm happy.

You can have either trust or love. Which one?
You can't have love without trust. So, trust.

If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
I've been to so many places that if I never went anywhere else again outside the US, I'd be ok with it. Having said that, I do want to get Mr. B to Italy one of these days.

Are you the kind of friend you'd want to have as a friend?
Yep.

Your best friend dies. What would you do.
One of my best friends did just recently die. I've done my best (and will continue to do so) to honor her memory. But, you have to go on with life (and she would have totally agreed). I suppose I'll do the same if and when the time ever comes again with another friend.

When was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you felt?
I do this all of the time. Just ask Mr. B! However, there have been a few people that I've refrained from telling them how I felt about something they did/didn't do because I decided it wasn't worth it. You have to pick and choose your battles and pick and choose the relationships that are important enough to you to risk loosing.

What would be harder for you; to tell someone that you love them or to tell someone that you do not love them back?
Definitely the latter.

What would be the hardest thing for you to give up?
Since the word is "thing" I'm staying away from live beings like people or pets. I'm going with financial independence.

Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying in front of you?
Uh, wow. I think so, but I have to admit, I'd probably a) call 911 on my cell phone first and b) hope someone else jumped in before me.

Are you old-fashioned?
Not really, except about certain things such as SENDING THANK YOU NOTES, damnit!

What would you choose? True love with a guarantee of heartache or never to love at all?
Well, that's just a totally inane question. Besides, I don't have to choose, it's already happened. You love someone, you can bet your sweet bippy at some point your heart is going to ache.

If you could wish for anything to come true, what would you wish?
Right now the most obvious wish would be that my step-mother was back with us, totally healthy.

What's your middle name?
Nee Christina.

How big is your bed?
King.

What music are you listening to right now?
None.

What was the last thing you ate?
Pot Sticker Pad Thai.

How is the weather right now?
It's a SCORCHER! And, it's also really, really humid. Ugh.

Who was the last person you hugged?
Mr. B.

What was the last movie you watched?
The King's Speech.

What movie will you watch next?
Likely the most recent (on DVD) Harry Potter movie.

What are you currently reading?
I have five going on right now. The White Queen. Catcher in the Rye. Schooled. Remarkable Creatures. Wherever You Go, There You Are.

What's on the agenda for today?
After I get off my butt doing this survey, I will work out, go to the store, and continue to pack up stuff around the house in preparation for our move.

Anything exciting coming up?
A trip to FL at the end of the month.

What is something you'd happily do again?
Go on a cruise.

Ok, enough questions! Time to get a move on!

Mrs. B